Insecurities

What does Maxx think of school?
Does he cooperate in class?
Is he making friends?
Is he learning?
Does he think I'm abandoning him when I leave?
What does Maxx's teacher think of him?
What does Maxx's teacher think of me as a mom? As a person?
What do the other kids think of Maxx?
What do the other parents think of Maxx?
What do the other parents think of me as a mom? As a person?
Will Maxx learn to socialize and gain confidence so he can be successful in life?

I was extremely shy, quiet and introverted growing up. I lived in my sister's shadow and thought I was the most boring and "normal" person alive. At the time, the only area I was confident in was my studies.

None of my friends now would ever guess that I was like this as a child. (Well, except the nerd part.) In college, after finding God to be real in my life, I became confident and often times had too much to say. And post college, it just continued and I found myself a happier person.

Lately, I've been feeling like the adolecent version of myself and I'm not liking it. All these questions have crossed my mind repeatedly...some more than others. I wonder if it's just me or if this is normal. After becoming a mom, I've definitely regressed a bit in the confidence arena. And having 3 kids in such a short timeframe...it's not helping.

Whether or not these questions are typical of a mom new to the world of school aged kids...I do know that I'm not trusting God as much as I used to. Life is so much harder now and so I need to work harder at trusting God with everything. I need to remember that includes my kids and every aspect of who they are.